The happiest place on earth
A surprise is brewing here in the Glover house. It’s a once-in-a-lifetime blow-your-mind surprise for the children.
And they have no idea. If you’re the kind of person who can’t keep a secret, just stop reading right now. You’ve got to keep it in until Monday. If you can do that, then raise your right hand. Take the oath of silence. Got it? Okay. Proceed.
It all started a few weeks ago when my mother-in-law called to tell us that Jeff’s aunt and uncle wanted to take the three older children to Disneyland for the week. They were going to bring Nana along too, just to make sure the kids were comfortable since Uncle Fred and Aunt LaVonne are twice-a-year relatives and the kids might feel better going to California with someone they know better. Besides, everything is better with a Nana, even Disney.
Disney! Ahhhhhhhh!
I was stunned when I heard it. Never in a million years would we be able to take our children to Disneyland. Maybe if we were stationed in California we could take the kids there for a day, but to fly? And to stay for days on end? That was out of the question. It’s one of the realities of having five children. Some things should not even be wished for.
But that is not the way Uncle Fred and Aunt LaVonne think. They have always had hearts big enough for crazy wishes, and even though they have grandchildren of their own to spoil and love on, they have hearts big enough for a few more. Even five more.
But all five children were not going to Disney, only three. I hung up the phone and let that thought sink in. Only three children would be going to Disney, three children when all five were old enough to know what was going on and what was being left out.
I went to bed that night but I couldn’t sleep. What a beautiful gift we had been given. It was so beautiful, it almost hurt. It hurt because all of my children couldn’t have it.
It hurt because my twins would know they were being left out, and I didn’t know how to justify that. We are the kind of family that does everything together. From dawn to dusk, my children share the same space, the same activities, the same experiences. On the rare occasions when one of them is gone, the others languish like they’ve lost a limb.
The one who is singled out doesn’t fair much better. When I took Jonathan out for his birthday, he often paused his constant chatter about birds of prey and knives and speculations about how fast he could run to sigh dramatically and say, “I wonder what The Others are doing now.”
I wonder what the others are doing now…
The twins were going to notice. They were going to feel it. And I ached for them over it.
I ached so much, I almost couldn’t let the other three go. It felt selfish and mean to hold something back from the older ones just because the little ones couldn’t have it too. How could I deny my children the experience of a lifetime? But then I thought of those boys, those sweet boys who practically can’t function without Kya, their social coordinator, and Jonathan, their wrestle-buddy, and Faith, their story-reader and horse. Yes, horse.
I put my head on Jeff’s shoulder and cried it all out.
“Life isn’t fair,” he said in his I’m-going-to-make-it-okay voice. “Sometimes, it doesn’t come out the same, and the sooner our kids can learn that, the better.”
I got that. Really. I did. We have never tried to treat our kids as equals; we have treated them as individuals with different needs and different gifts. Sometimes, that means one of them gets a new pair of shoes and the others don’t.
But this is Disney. This is not just a new pair of shoes. This is the-greatest-thing-that-happened-in-my-childhood kind of thing. This is the stuff that will cause my twins to dye their hair blue and tattoo mouse ears on their bodies when they’re twenty-three. If I ask them why they’ll say, “You never took us to Disney.”
Cut out my heart.
Run away! Run away!
“We need to let them go,” Jeff assured me.
I knew it. I just didn’t know how to live with it.
So, I’ve kept it a secret. I’ve kept it a secret and I’ve poured all my creative energies into making this epic experience even more epic. It is Epic Supersized. I am doctoring my heart by planning the most amazing surprise my older kids have even known. They have no idea where they are going. They do not know they will be spending a week with Nana. They do not know they will be flying on a plane! They do not know they will be landing in California and spending three luscious days at the Happiest Place on Earth.
Here in my little laboratory (pronounced la-BORE-uh-tory), I am crafting up a Disney storm. Wait until you see the pixie dust I’ve concocted. You will die.
Somewhere in all my plotting and scheming and crafting, it has become okay. I guess that’s one of the ways to cope when life isn’t fair: you add glitter.
The other half of my brain is planning a week of precious memories with my littlest loves. Oh, the places we will go! They will not know that their siblings are at Disney. It’s better that way, I think. They will have time enough to know it when their sisters and brother return. They don’t need to be jealous about it while they’re gone.
All they will know is that they are loved.
And isn’t that the best thing to know when life isn’t fair?
Kristen, I so enjoy your writing, your way of putting words together and thoughts down in print. :>) This is all going to turn out wonderful. God is in it! We faced the same things with our family of five. I recall how everyone went to bed at the same time until one day our oldest asked why she had to go to bed the same time as “him” he being the youngest. We realized we treated them as a unit, a group in everything and it was time to make some changes. So we let her stay up a half hour later and that became the status…”When you’re ___yrs old you can stay up until 8:30, etc.” Of course, there were whines of “How come ___ gets to stay up?” The same with birthdays. I’ve never understood why some think that every child has to get some thing when it’s so&so’s birthday. They each had their special day and we all did what we could to make it that way. I know everyone is going tohave the bestest time ever. :>)
Thank you, June. You are such an encouragement to me!
If I had the money I’d send the little loves! Oh my heart is aching with you friend. But there are sure to be some HUGE blessings at home too. 🙂
You are so sweet. It has worked out really well, and you’re right–there are HUGE blessings at home!
I sent you an email with a photo of my daughter as Tinker Bell to possibly utilize in this Disney week at home time. 🙂 She looks just like Tink – in fact wants to audition at Disney World to be Tink. Little ones love the pic so I thought I’d send it your way. – Heather
Oh my goodness! I thought I responded to you. I’m so sorry. We LOVED the picture! Kya thinks she is so gorgeous (and she is!). Thanks for thinking of us and sending it our way. I’m not sure where my brain is (except, it’s probably at Disneyland). 😉
So glad they loved it! Thanks for the sweet words. I think she’s pretty gorg-e-oso but I’m biased. HAHA!
Ps- you might have responded and I might have lost it. Lol. I lost a LOT in my switch to a new computer. Like.. My mind!
I hope someone takes pictures along the way to capture their expressions as they realize where they’re going. And what a good idea not to let the twins know until later where the older ones have gone. That way your awesome “staycation” will be truly AWESOME!
Wow. The wisdom of Solomon is needed here. I am sure the Lord will lead you the right way.
Disneyland is TIRING! Fun, yes, but VERY TIRING. You really do need one adult per child for it, too. At the twins’ age, they won’t be able to go on the rides that the three older ones will/might. The first time I went, I was 4. I was a little too young for it (my brother was 2…DEFINITELY too young!).
Jeff is right. They’re getting older. You can’t keep one (or three) from having an experience just because the others can’t, aren’t invited, are too young, wrong gender, etc. You can’t make everything the same. Your kids need to learn how to operate independently of the others, too.
Someday, it’s to be hoped, they’ll all get married. They won’t all get married at the same time. They won’t all be marrying the same person. The other 4 siblings and you and Jeff won’t be going on the honeymoons with the new spouse. 😀
I’m so glad you’re letting the older three go on the adventure. It’s so incredibly nice (brave) and generous of Jeff’s uncle and aunt to want to take them, even for a day, let alone a week. And it’s so great you’re planning to do special stuff with the twins while you have them to yourselves.
It sounds like a win-win. The older kids will get to spend time with Nana, Aunt and Uncle, and Disney!, and the twins will get their own time with you. Our 5, grown now, learned that taking turns is part of being a family. They are extremely close (age wise and otherwise), even now, and also confident and independent. Independent experiences are important, and remind us not to get too hung up on keeping things ‘fair’ or ‘even’. That’s the way we learn about the ups and downs of life. Hope it’s a great week for all. 🙂
Def. would feel the same as you. I am glad that you are planning some fun times at home. I was from a family of 9, and we did everything together, which I loved, but looking back it would have been nice to have some one on one time. Maybe your twins, will feel special by the personalized attention.
I hope so! We do try to give them one-on-one time, but it’s short and sweet. This will be a much different experience, but we’re looking forward to doing things that two four-year-olds love to do, and not have to worry that the older ones will be bored. Life is so fun at four! We will have a blast!
We are a “do everything together unless Dad is sleeping (3rd shift)” kind of family, too. I am saddened for my sons who aren’t invited to the “girls only” birthday party, and that isn’t close to Disney! Glad you found a way to make the twins’ time special, too 🙂
Sounds like a generous gift, and one that I bet the twins will get to enjoy when they are a little older. Managing five kids would be quite an undertaking for non-parents, even with Nana!
I know, right? I’m not sure I would wish that on anyone! 😉
Oh, I wish ALL of you could go! But, the Disney stay-cation sounds quite exciting too!
Make sure that one of the fun activities you plan for the twins is a reading of Romans and the clay pots etc. Were it not for the fact that all those dead in their sins don’t desire salvation, this situation could almost be analogous to the reformed understanding of election.
You will make it a great week for everyone!
Exactly! Great thought!
Except they may not completely ready for a Jeff-level explication of Romans 9. 🙂